Is It Possible To Miss Out On Your Soulmate?

We all experience different types of relationships but often we hear about "soulmates". What exactly is a soulmate?

Dictionary.com defines the term as:

a person with whom one has strong affinity.

Wikipedia.com defines the term as:

someone with whom one has a feeling of deep and natural affinity

In my effort to be consistent with definitions as I am not sure who will read this since it is a public blog, lol.

Affinity is defined as (in dictionary.com):

a natual liking for or attraction to a person, thing, idea, etc.

Anyhoo, back to my point, lol. Whenever we fall in love with someone we believe them to be our soulmate until the demise of the relationship. Can that possibly mean that person was not your soulmate? If so that would indicate that if you have met your soulmate and something caused the two of you to separate, you would have missed out on your one great, true love. No?

I'm beginning the question the belief of soulmates. I haven't had many "loves" of my life but I've had enough to know that I do not wish to experience the heartbreak that comes with realizing that the person I was giving my love to was not the "real thing". I often hear that I will know when it is real. When am I supposed to hear that voice talk to me? Is it after I get married to the person or after I let a good one get away?

There is always that person that seems to be your perfect jigsaw piece and you stick them in the "friend" category. The end up in that category because you fight your natural attraction for that person because you feel they may be unattainable. Then when it comes to the point that you are ready to see if this person really is who you are meant to be with, you find out they are seeing someone. Say, you go through this scenario with the same person a number of times, be it you addressing them or vice versa, the same situation arises. Is it simply a case of bad timing? How can your soulmate have bad timing? If it's meant to be, it will be, right? You hold on to that belief and you sit and wait. Nothing. Time passes and you are still in constant enough contact that when you don't speak you miss them. You now feel that you can't tell this person how you feel anymore for fear of "bad timing". What happens when you muster up the courage to inform your "friend" that there is a special spot reserved in your heart for them? They are amazed that you could feel such a way. You question yourself wondering why they didn't already know this. With the number of times affection was declared between the two of you, it should have been impossible not to know. There is an unsettled chemistry that is aching to be attended to. Do you give up and resolve this person can't be the one for you? If not you think that you would be together already. Or do you say forget that and go after what you want?

I know everything happens in it's own time but since tomorrow is never promised, can it be that some of us may never experience that pure, real love? I want to love and want to be loved in return. Can it happen if my supposed soulmate doesn't know he's supposed to be my soulmate? If they don't know it, could it be that aren't my soulmate?

That could be the situation too. What if the other person has yet to realize that you can be their soulmate? How long is too long to wait for the realization? Is it ever anyone's fault if a soulmate if missed out on? Can you place blame anywhere? I doubt it because HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN YOU HAVE MET YOUR SOULMATE??????

If you never know you met them, can you miss out? If they don't know you are their soulmate, can you miss out?

In the words of Mos Def, "the questions, the questions. the answers, the answers."

The best I can do is "Let Go and Let God!!"

Is It Wrong To Do Something For Yourself When You're Constantly Pleasing (or trying to) Others All The Time?

I recently asked myself this question and I have determined that is not wrong to want to do anything that will bring you joy at any given point in one's life. We have so many demands placed upon us each and everyday that we can easily forget about "me". I feel that remembering "me" is imperative. We should never fear that doing something for ourself can be thought of as wrong.

I recently lost my job and while I'm in no way upset about it, I carried on as though I still did have a job. There was a week long celebration in my city of residence and I participated in a few events/parties, lol. One may think, "she just lost her job and she's out there partying and spending money like she has continuous checks coming". Guess what, I am a grown woman and if I felt like I could not afford to do the things I do, I would not. My biggest stress causer has just been lifted and I am celebrating. Yes, I'm pleased by my unemployed status. Honestly, I haven't even updated my resume to start looking for another job yet. This past week was about "doing me". It had been so long since I was able to do so and I LOVED EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF IT!!! I would do it all again, if given the opportunity. I enjoyed great company and entertainment. When I lost my job, I felt empowered and willing to do whatever the hell I wanted to do.

Guess what, I'M GOING TO DO WHATEVER I WANT TO DO.

NEVER A REGRET IN MY LIFE!!!

From Beginning to No End

This poem was inspired by a friend that I had previously lost contact with as a child but re-entered my life as another "friend" exited. My thought is that the fake friend was removed to make way in my heart for my REAL friend. Anyway, here it is:

You are my friend
From beginning to no end
Through togetherness and separation
As though time was never lost
Experiencing life at the same time
With our differences and similarities
We never missed a beat
Getting in where we fit in each other's life
It was a simple feat
Mainly because God knew we were meant to be
Our different paths led us to the same point
Where we became part of one another again
Now we have a legacy to take over wherever we leave off
They will know a great friendship never dies
Yet, it thrives
On an undying bond of love
From 1989 until the year 2989 and beyond
I will always love you, my friend
From Beginning to No End

2008

In writing my poetry I get very lax with grammar, so pardon the lack of puncuations and such.